Saturday, January 15, 2011

Swearing in Public

Dear Press Council of South Africa,
          It’s me again. I’ve noticed your ads calling for ideas on how to improve newspapers so I thought you would be interested in my five cents worth. Of course you may think my in-put is not even worth that. But while I ‘m all for listening to the other point of view this is my blog so you have no say. Here goes.
          Did you see that piece the Gutter Chronicle carried on me. It was all about the dispute I’m having with my neighbour because his dogs bark non, f….ng stop. The paper quoted him as saying, That little sh.t just doesn’t like dogs so he can get sc….d.
          And it had me replying, If that ba…..d thinks he can tell me to get st….d and nothing will bl…y well happen he must think again. I’ve had enough of his c..p.
          The point I’m trying to make is that isn’t it about time your office decided whether papers should dot or not dot. Surely as the so called free press, newspapers should have the guts to either print these so called unmentionable words in full or leave them out altogether.
           Who do they think they are kidding by censoring words by filling them with dots? What’s behind it? Are they trying to protect the morals of grown ups?
          You can’t possibly have anything more important on your agenda, so please hurry up and make a bl…y ruling before the Gutter Chronicle carries another report on my dispute. They misquoted me completely. I have never, ever said any words with a lot of dots in them.
          Now my ar…le of a lawyer tells me that dots are not actionable. To say the law’s an a..e would be putting it mildly.
          Yours Hopefully,
PS  All the alleged sw..r words in this letter are courtesy of my wife, who has been dotting mine for years.
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BAN CYCLISTS on Cape Town’s Ou Kaapse Weg.
This mountain pass is too narrow for motorists and two wheel kamikaze kids who can’t recognise the danger for themselves.

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