Gun Mad American Pratts

Traitor Morgan

Dear Americans,

         Are you all going stark, staring mad? Have you lost your marbles completely? Are you hell bent on committing national suicide by ensuring that everyone has an armoury of guns at their finger tips?

          Are you not a bit concerned about school massacres like the Newtown one where 20 kids and six adults got mowed down by some mad man?

Have you become immune to this kind of thing; because it happens to often that the last thing you want is for anybody to take your most treasured toys away from you? Toys like the AR15 Bushmaster assault rifle that can spray bullets all over the place better than a hose pipe can spray water.

          Ask the Newtown survivors how effective it is?

          In spite of that killing you people are still reluctant to talk about gun control. But, as has been the case after every other similar shooting, you are doing your best to pretend there isn’t a fire arm problem in the US. It’s the mentally disturbed people, who use them that are the problem, and that’s why everybody needs a gun for protection.

         But what you don’t seem to realise is that when it comes to guns you are all in the same boat – totally mentally disturbed. And that boat is busy sinking you all, shot through with a bigger variety of bullets than you might get in any war.

          How else could you describe a nation who rushes out to buy more and more guns like the Bushmaster after a school massacre instead of saying, Enough of the killing, we must get rid of all guns.

          In this climate somebody is bound to go for the record. What will it be – 100 children with one magazine; 500 at two different schools; a thousand, two thousand who knows?

          Britain’s Pier’s Morgan couldn’t believe his ears when he led a discussion on the subject on CNN where he replaced that true blue American, talk show host Larry King two years ago.

The Biggest Pratt of all

          In Britain the cops don’t routinely carry guns and they had a mere 58 people shot last year compared with around 10 000 in the US. So it was hardly surprising that Morgan went ballistic when the appropriately named Larry Pratt, the executive director of Gun Owners of America, gave arming more people as the answer to school massacres.

          What a brilliant idea. Make Annie Get Your Gun compulsory as the theme song at every school with the motto: If you can pick it up you can learn to shoot with it.

          Richard Blumenthal, the Senator for Connecticut, the state where the latest school war zone took place, was as pathetic as everybody else. He began by telling Morgan, "There’s no single solution."

          What utter rubbish; of course there is. Ban all guns.

          The best he could come up with was "Ban assault weapons which everybody knows were designed for military purposes." Well if everybody knows this only those in a loony bin would allow everybody to buy one.

          Morgan’s expose` of the mad house that is America moved on to Texan gun shop owner and instructor Crocket Keller or should it be Killer?  He looks at school shootings as just another opportunity to sell more dangerous weapons and is offering a discount on guns to teachers with this helpful advice. "Every principal should have an AR15 in her office." Preferable one of his of course.

          That’s another great idea, so when he or she is in the toilet some deranged kid with a grudge, who forgot his own one at home, can help himself and blast away around the school.  

He'll need those guns - Top of el-Qaeda's hit list

          Our public spirited Texan wants teachers, nurses and even clergyman armed. Sterilised guns in operating theatres will be next. As he put it, "The name of the game is to have fire power equal to that of the criminals."

          Now that Morgan, a foreigner, has had the temerity to show you up for what you are Alex Jones. The Texas radio host has started a petition to have him kicked out of the country for his "hostile attack on the US Constitution." You would think it was Pearl Harbour all over again the way he’s carrying on.

          Your Bible, the Constitution stipulates in the Second Amendment that everyone has the right to bear arms.

         You would expect a radio host to know that freedom of speech comes under the First Amendment. So that’s how crazy you have all become, when somebody like this, of all people, believes that it is more important to protect gun toting, cowboys rather than free speech.

Morgan's reply

          His petition to the White House already has more than the 25 000 names required to get a response. Another petition last year showed how barmy you people have become when the White House was asked if the government had contact with aliens. They were told there was no evidence that these existed.

          It will be interesting to see what answer our insane journalist and his followers get. How about this? Our scientists have found that there is no cure for ‘mad gun disease’ other than to put down the entire population. So if Morgan has a better idea we should let him try.

          Having the British bobby unarmed has been shown to make Britain a less violent country than in places where the police have guns.

         So anybody who thinks the more guns you have the safer you are, needs his head examined.

          It’s going to be a job getting an AR15 into little Johnnie’s Christmas stocking.

Happy Shooting and a Killing New Year,

          Jon 

P.S. Ha! Ha! Deporting me is not an option. I don’t live in that land of the free of yours, so I can say what I like.