ROUGHEST SILK IN THE LAND - DALI MPOFU THE BLACK SENIOR ADVOCATE TELLS FEMALE WHITE ONE TO 'SHUT UP'

Dear Readers, 

    Is Deputy Chief Justice Raymond Zondo too nice a guy to be in that snapping advocates pool that forms such a major part of the State Capture Commission that he is heading? 

    Here’s an example of how the farcical side of it works: I give evidence about you which you don’t like. Weeks or months later your advocate is allowed to cross examine me about what I said about you. That can go on for almost as long as it took me to give my evidence in the first place. 

    Various statements as well as Judge Zondo’s comments that have been made along the way are repeated ad nauseam. Eventually my advocate is allowed to re-examine me to clarify and perhaps correct what your advocate said about me. This second stage of the farce can go on for half a day or more with the main characters earning huge sums, making it very much in their interests to extend their arguments as long as possible, so ones that tell colleagues to ‘Shut up’ clearly do not have the system at heart.

Whoever said ‘the law is an ass’ was spot on. 

The characters in the now famous ‘Shut up’ wake up moment at the Commission’s hearing were:

    Dali Mpofu (59): He is an advocate, who as an ANC member was CEO of the SABC for four years where he did such a brilliant job that he was rewarded by being give an 18 month holiday – suspension on full pay. In 2009 he ended his association with the controversy plagued national broadcaster with another even more impressive ‘thank you’ for his good work - a R12-million golden handshake. In 2014 he left the African National Congress party and joined Julius Malema’s Economic Freedom Fighters where he was this party’s Chairperson for a while. Rumour has it that it was under Malema’s tutelage that he learned his good manners. 

    Michelle le Roux: She is the advocate lady Gentleman Dali told to ‘Shut up’ when she was representing Pavin Gordhan, the Minister of Public Enterprises. Her background is without any blemishes like being suspended from her job and being a member of a pock marked political party. She is an Adjunct Professor at the University of Cape Town’s Law School and was named as one of Who’s Who’s Notable Women among Legal Competition Professionals in Europe, the America’s and Africa who are in their forties. She is also a Global Competition Review Litigator of the Year (Non-cartel) winner, SO WHO SHOULD DEFINITELY BE TOLD TO ‘SHUT UP’? 

    They need a naughty corner for advocates like Dali where they can be sent for a week or two. SC's earn around R50 000 a day so that might encourage the foul mouthed to to keep their traps shut. Fortunately 'Shut up' and similar outbursts are a rarity among advocates. If they weren't our courts would make for far more entertaining TV viewing than they do  now.

You be the judge, 

Regards, Jon, a Manners Judge of long standing, although I am not sure that my mother would agree with this if she was still around.

P.S. The Sunday Times put into words what everyone else was thinking:

JOBS ADVERTISEMENTS TELL A STORY OF A BLOATED INCOMPETENT GOVERNMENT WITH A SHADY SIDE

 Dear Readers,

William Hlakoane

          I get the Johannesburg based Sunday Times every week and it is noticeable in pages and pages of expensive career ads that the private sector, which is supposed to be the driving force behind South Africa’s economic recovery hardly features at all. They are mostly for positions in local and provincial government and state owned enterprises, where just about everyone seems to be a director or deputy director.

          The most recent one that I came across that turned out to be extremely dubious was for a Group Chief Executive Officer for Denel our government owned arms manufacturer that has virtually imploded with the help of the Guptas, as it is struggling to pay its staff.  The half page ad which cost around R100 000 appeared on Sunday February 21 with a closing date of 5 March.

First thing the following morning the Board headed by Monhla Hlahla announced that William Hlakoane, the current Chief Operating Officer had been appointed acting CEO for six months. Does she think that will be long enough to turn Denel around? Clearly he must have been the chosen one before the ad even appeared, so how legitimate is his appointment. Is it another jobs for the boys appointment? Don’t these, particularly high powered ones like this that involve a salary of several million a year, have to be properly advertised before someone is named?

The Board is still looking for a permanent head. Hlakoane, who replaced the interim CEO Talib Sadik whose contract expired, is the 9^th CEO or acting CEO since the ANC came to power in 1994. Sadik was the CEO some years ago.  To add to Denel’s problems 4 directors resigned in the last couple of months making things rather lonely for Hlahla, the former Airports Company of SA Chief Executive who became chairperson of the Denel Board in 2018. Airports to a high tech arms company is a very incongruous move. 

It’s seems it’s more important to waste a huge amount of money on an ad that was clearly place for show when a decision had already been made, than paying staff.  What the hell it’s only tax payer’s money so who cares.

Monhla Hlahla

Among the 12 Qualification and Experience Requirements in this Denel ad was: “Proven experience and exhibition of achievement in Business Turnaround Strategy Implementation” I find it difficult to believe that Hlakoane complied with this or some of the other ones on the list. 

          Another smelly ad was from the tiny municipality of Nkandla, a name made notorious by its high profile resident our former President Jacob Zuma. While in office he quite illegitimately had his homestead there upgraded with R246-million of our money.

          Although the municipality is surprisingly now controlled by the Inkatha Freedom Party,  as opposed to Zuma’s ruling African National Congress, it is following, in its small way, Zuma’s example of how to squander public funds.

          It’s ad for a General Worker at a salary of R9000 a month cost R10 520 for one insertion in the paper. It made no sense to spend this amount to place this in a national paper when there must be any number of people in Nkandla capable of making the tea and doing the cleaning and the job was for somebody at the bottom of the employment ladder.

          The ads also paint a dismal picture of municipalities and even provincial Governments like Mpumalanga that are still in the dark ages. Their job applications can only be submitted by post and with our broken postal service there must be a huge number of positions that remain vacant before any applications arrive. The last time I was sent a letter by post I got it three months later.

           The comical gobbledygook job descriptions for some of the highly paid jobs explain completely why our local government is in such a mess with numerous municipalities and the like under administration. For instance the Chris Hani District Municipality in the Eastern Cape wants a Director, Health and Community Services (5 year fixed performance contract, salary negotiable).

The following Competences are required:

·      Critical competences that drive the strategic intent and direction.

·      Core competences that drive the execution of critical competences.

·      Working in a team to advise Council & Committees.

          If this is what the ‘team’ produces heaven help the people in that area who rely on this humpty dumpty organisation. No faxed or emailed applications will be accepted. They had to send them to a Private Bag address or hand delivered them.       

          In a whole page ad that probably cost about half a million the Mpumalanga Provincial Government called for applications for 46 posts that included 3 Directors (R1 057 326 p.a.), 4 Deputy Directors (R733 257 p.a.), 4 Assistance Directors (R376 596 p.a.) and 16 cleaners at R102 234 p.a each. Helpfully would be career cleaners were told that the requirements included “Ability to work under pressure and to remain focused towards productivity” and a “Basic knowledge on utilization of cleaning equipment will be an added advantage.”

          Among the requirements for the Directors  was “Honesty and integrity.” They don’t seem to know that both words mean the same thing. This is evidently not necessary for anybody below the rank of Director because it doesn’t get mentioned again when HONESTY should be the number one requirement for anybody joining the public service. No wonder there are so many who don’t seem to have heard of it.

          The various departments have such little confidence in their abilities to pick the right person for the job that all the top salary earners are employed on 5 year contracts.  Is this the Government’s way of preventing top officials from remaining on suspension forever on huge salaries? Mind you even five years could cost the fiscus a fortune.

          The Employment Equity Act seems to be causing a great deal of confusion. Here are some interpretations.

          Magalies Water ad for a Chief Operations Office and Payroll Manager: “Preference will be given to African females, Coloured, Indians, White males and people living with disabilities.”

          City of Johannesburg ad for Group Human Capital Management: “This is an employment equity targeted position and preference will be given to African males, White males and African females and White females, including people with disabilities."

          National Gambling Board ad for a Researcher and a Legal and Stakeholder Engagement Intern at salaries of R12 000 a year – not much more than cleaners get: “In terms of the Employment Equity preference will be given to Coloureds, Indians, Whites and people with disabilities.”

          Nyandeni Local Municipality, Eastern Cape ad for a Senior Manager: Infrastructure Development: “Females, Coloureds, Indians, Whites and People with disabilities are encouraged to apply.”

          Most stated they abide by the Employment Equity act or did not comment on it at all.

 Regards,

Jon, a Consumer Watchdog and Poor Man’s Press Ombudsman.

 P.S. Anybody who still believes that apartheid is dead does not live in South Africa. When are we going to grow up enough to be able to employ the best person for the job regardless of their colour?

 

 

             

WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE A COVID LEPER

 Dear Readers,

Sally Witherden is our 53 year old daughter, who lives in Johannesburg and this is her Covid story in her own words.

I recently became a proud grandmother, but before I saw my little grandchild for the first time, I thought it a good idea to get tested for Covid.  My results came back negative and I was delighted to meet Callum when he was 3 days old.  Having hardly seen my daughter during this terrible time it was great for the family and to spend some time together, although still adhering to social distancing, wearing of masks etc.  But still the best thing to come out of 2020!       

The following week to my horror, my team members at work were advised that they had recently been exposed to someone with Covid (although I had not been at the office) but due to company policy we all had to be tested, including myself. I was very reluctant as the previous Thursday had tested negative! Imagine my surprise when my results came back positive, “What the hell” and I was the only one!  I had been at the doctor and a local hospital for an unrelated issue earlier in the week, so did I get it in the office, or had I picked this up at the doctor that week?  It seemed impossible because I constantly wash my hands, sanitise and wear a mask, in fact was very diligent - almost obsessive, “There was no way I was going to get Covid” and especially not now that I wanted to see my little Callum.

I also had no symptoms at all – nothing!  I was advised to just self-isolate at home because I was feeling well enough and I am in the very fortunate situation in that I could go to my weekend house at the Vaal, to be away from anyone and to not pass the virus on to the other people in my home, who had tested negative.  I have to admit I was in total denial that I actually had the virus – how could I test negative one week and then positive the next and no-one I had been in contact with had tested positive, and I had no symptoms at all, it must have been a mistake.

The day I tested it might have been day 4 already, depending where I picked up this stealth virus.  By day 6 I started feeling mild symptoms – headaches, aching legs and muscles, slight temperature, confusion and mainly very tired, no energy and slept solidly for the next 3 days.  Thereafter although still tired started to improve day by day and feeling like my old self, I was very relieved to have only had very “mild symptoms” and this is what you hear from many people who have had this virus – “I was lucky”, “I pulled through easily with very few symptoms” etc. etc.   However, do not think for one minute that once the 10-day quarantine is over your symptoms suddenly disappear.  Not at all, I started feeling other symptoms after I was deemed not contagious, my breathing was labored and was not 100% for about a week, I still get headaches now and then, often feel tired and cannot do any strenuous exercise and when I am tired I get easily confused.  As long as you have symptoms your mind plays games with you, and no it’s not old age - a simple tummy bug and you think you have Covid again!

What you do not hear from mild Covid sufferers is the absolute terror that rips through your sole when you see “Positive” on your results, especially if you are older and your doctor advises you to please not to ignore it.  It plays on your mind every day for the next 10 days, while you are “contagious”, that you have a killer virus taking over your body and you have NO control, you take the advised medication, rest and hope and pray that you will be able to say – “I had a very mild version” all the while waiting for it to get worse and the relief is unbelievable when you stay relatively well.  Also, you start thinking who you could have passed this virus on to and how easily they could also be affected as well, this plays on your conscious day in and day out, although you had no deliberate intentions and did not know you had the virus, and breathe a sigh of relief when they test negative and remain to be in good health.

Then you come out of self-isolation, people say you must be so relieved to get back to normal and you want to start getting back to normal.  But what is normal?  Trust me, nothing is normal again and will not be until we all have been inoculated and have developed herd immunities.  I was really petrified to go near any family members and still stay away as much as I can.  Going into shops, I really avoid talking or being near anyone, you almost hold your breath when talking to someone so not to breathe on anyone – it is terrible.  And this fear is not only because I am afraid to get the virus again - because I am afraid  - just because I have had it does not mean I am immune and I am really scared to pass it on, even though I am not contagious anymore

People’s reactions to you are also quite strange.  You have the people who are afraid to even call you when you are self-isolating (or after) because they don’t know what to say or maybe think you will pass it to them over the phone …… haha.  Then when you come out of isolation people naturally do not want come in contact “just in case” you are still contagious and even those willing to spend time with you will almost sit as far away as possible or lean back as far as they can, when standing talking to you even though there is a good distance between you already – just to keep their distance,  a small lunch that is set up is suddenly cancelled because you are invited, so you start feeling a bit like an outcast and then you get the people who see you and can’t believe you had Covid because you look fine, so ask if you really did have it?  My advice to those people is if you are worried you will get it stay away, I would not take offence, it is natural.  And further advice stay at home it’s just safer - that’s what I am doing, on-line is brilliant, everything you could want at the touch of a button.

Note: Leprosy, an infection of the skin, was once consider to be so highly contagious that the word ‘leper’ came to be used to describe anybody who was shunned by others on moral or on other social grounds.

 

 Dear Readers,

Gert-Johan Coetzee

          They evidently have short memories at the Johannesburg based Sunday Times. Eight years ago its ‘fashion’ fundi Lin Sampson slammed just about every aspect of the dress South African fashion designer Gert-Johan Coetzee created for a seventeen-year-old girl’s matric dance.

          Now in a huge about turn in the lead story in its Insight section recently, it described him as ‘one of the country’s most sought-after dressmakers.’

          Talk about eating Sampson’s words, which were very unpalatable, this article was, fortunately for Coetzee, not one of Sampson. It was written by Leonie Wagner.

          The one Sampson regurgitated was about Melanie Olhaus, who showed commendable ingenuity and daring to get Olympic swimming gold medallist Chad le Clos to agree to partner her at her matric dance. She did this by holding up an invitation placard in the crowd that gathered at Johannesburg airport to welcome athletes returning from the Games.

          But instead of concentrating on this aspect of what was a very unusual story, Sampson did her best to ruin the girl’s special occasion by letting her poisonous pen  run wild about the girl’s matric dress and Coetzee himself.

          She began: “Okay, so the dress was wrong. Anyone could see that. It was a bit like a Swiss cheese,” she went on, “a hole where you expect cheese, or a bit like a bathing suite that Ester Williams, a 50s swimming star might have worn – in the pool – and it was little more than an animated rag.”

          And if her own bitchy remarks were not enough she quoted an anonymous colleague, who I do not believe existed, as saying, “It didn’t fit.”

          After having a field day knocking Melanie’s dress Sampson turned her attention to the designer. One of his greatest crimes, apart from Melanie’s dress, was having designed one for one of the Kardashian sisters. That made him “a warrior of the junk genre de jour, of reality TV, of people who are famous for being famous (whatever that means), people who are not famous at all but think they are.”

          As if that was not enough of an insult she added: “With his platinum curls and sweet lips, he has a terminal case of celebriphilia.”

          In Sampson’s opinion Melanie didn’t even get her hair style right as it was “augmented with extensions that gave the appearance of boiling over.”

          The latest article in the Sunday Times told us that Coetzee has designed dresses for the likes of Miss Universe Demi-Leigh Nel-Peters, Oprah Winfrey US singer Kelly Rowland and various other stars.

          Not bad for a curly haired farm boy.

          By coincidence Sampson’s byline that I have not seen all that often in the paper recently, appeared in the same edition as the one about Coetzee pictured on his family’s farm. Sampson was the author of The Drag Trade, about the queens of the Cape that appeared in the LifeStyle section.

          Regards,

          Jon, the Poorman’s Press Ombudsman and defender of curly haired designers.

          See also:lin-sampson-out-bitching-herself.html

 

NEW BOOK DOCUMENTS THE WORST SOUTH AFRICAN MEDICAL SCANDAL EVER

 Dear Readers,

                                                                

         For nearly two decades The Butcher of Rosebank was allowed to go on operating while the Health Professions Council that is supposed to police doctors failed dismally to prevent him maiming patient after patient.

         His serious criminal activities were completely ignored even though they were so wide ranging that they should have stopped him from practising medicine entirely. Other people have been jailed for less.

         I am a former Sunday Times investigative journalist turned Private Eye, now retired.  And it was while working as a self-employed PI specialising in life insurance that I was asked to investigate the dread disease scams perpetrated by Dr Wynne Lieberthal, his doctor friends and a bent broker. The 600 page report I compiled for the various life companies involved formed the basis for this 300 page book.

         It contains the names of perhaps 60 or more doctors and other people in the medical professions as well as the particularly tragic stories of people who came under the Butcher’s scalpel.

         Mariskca du Plessis, the girl on the cover was just 14 when the Butcher put her into a wheel chair for life.

         The Book’s Chapter headings tell a story of their own: Sensational photograph; Bad addiction; Spreading cancer; Another doctor catches it; Media frenzy; Doctors eat Doctor; After his blood; Ailing advocate’s secret; Missing surgeon and so on.

        To get a copy contact me at Dearjon@webafrica.org.za.

SUNDAY TIMES NOW HAS ITS OWN VERSION OF THE BBC QUIZ SHOW POINTLESS

 Dear Readers,

         The Johannesburg based Sunday Times has introduced a new and very odd version of the BBC quiz show Pointless that is screened on our DStv.

         And what’s more it is the brain child of the relatively new Editor S’Thembiso Msomi, who writes a column in the paper every week. He took the very courageous and unusual step of giving his personal email address in his column. Did he think this through before revealing it? Had he lined up the necessary members of staff to help him deal with a possible avalanche of emails?

         Well if my experience it anything to go by it turned out to be completely POINTLESS.

I sent my first email on 21/9/2020 suggesting he included a certain story in his paper. And when I got no reply I repeated it on 30/9/2020 adding: “I wonder if you ever got this?” Again I got no reply. So last week I phoned the paper in an effort to speak to the Editor.

         It turned out that the Virus is so bad there that it’s a nightmare to find somebody to answer a phone. How you expect a newspaper with declining advertising sales to survive these days Mr Editor when you make it so difficult for anybody to speak to any member of your staff, is beyond me. Great news stories that could boost your paper’s circulation considerably could be passing you by daily. But that’s another story.

         Eventually I got hold of a reporter. I told him briefly what my problem was and he said he would pass it on to the Editor, who was expected to come in shortly. I gave him my telephone number. Well I’m still waiting to hear from the Editor. If he didn’t get my emails the least he could have done was to phone me to say so.

         In keeping with the theme of the Sunday Times’ version of the game my emails and telephone calls all turned out to be POINTLESS.

         Perhaps S’Thembiso your courage will extend to including this post in your column next week, if you ever see the email I am sending you with the link to it.

         Regards,

         Jon, the Poor Man’s Press Ombudsman and former Sunday Times investigative journalist in the days before COVID-19, when they didn’t play POINTLESS GAMES.

 

A DANGEROUS PIT BULL IN A 150 HOME HOUSING ESTATE HAS AN OWNER AS UNPREDICTABLE AS HIS DOG

Glocky

 Dear Readers,

          After Glocky, an 8 year old Pit Bull, with a reputation for attacking other animals, savaged a much smaller dog on a Cape Town estate, its owner Jaric Tolken has been doing his best to convince everyone there that it is not dangerous.  

          The attack has split the residents on the estate’s WhatsApp group with some saying Glocky should be hounded out, while others believe it should stay. People are worried that a child could be its next victim as on any day unaccompanied little children can be seen skateboarding or just milling around the quiet streets of the estate.

          While collecting information for this post I sent Jaric an email telling him that I proposed to write about what happened and I wanted to get both sides of the story.

          I told him I believed his wife was due to have a baby shortly and “in view of this do you think it will be safe to still have this dog around. Only last week a toddler got killed by a pit bull in Pietermaritzburg. Isn’t there a strong chance that your pit bull will get jealous of the attention being given to your new baby?”

          He replied: “Thanks for being reasonable and hearing both sides.” He described his dog as “very friendly and loving towards humans.”

          “I’m not concerned about Glocky,” he went on. “What kind of person would I be if I kept a dog I was concerned about near my child!!!”

         

Glocky look-alike
laughing it off

          Apart from a couple of pictures of Glocky - a black dog with a white patch on its chest - he attached a lot of other pit bulls that looked very similar and they were all being cuddled or lying next to small children. He was clearly trying to convince me that this was what his dog was like with children.

          But when I asked him to give me the names and ages of the children I got no reply. So I Googled ‘Pit Bull pictures with children’ and there I found some of the ones he had sent me.

           I emailed him saying: “Jaric am I correct in assuming that your dog is in none of these pictures of pits hulls with kids, because you took them off the internet?”

          That set him off. He turned out to be just as unpredictable as his dog.

          “Fuck off and have a nice day.” he replied. “Kind Regards, Jaric.”

          It seems that Suzi Schalk hit the nail on the head on the WhatsApp when she had this to say about Jaric: “The dog frankly, is the way it is because of the owner, Pity he doesn’t see it that way.”

          What she said after that about pit bulls being great dogs and other comments in favour of Jaric that made him thank her for her support was extremely odd. You see Suzi and he husband Willi, not only live on the state, but they are also estate agents who sell houses there. A vicious pit bull that is a danger is hardly a great selling point for anybody who might want to buy a house there.

Glocky's handiwork but fortunately his owner says
he is "very friendly to humans"

          Not for the first time Glocky attacked another dog last month after a painter left the property’s gate to the street open. He mauled Bobby, a six year old Smoodle (Schnauzer/Poodle cross) and his owner Lesley Lilley also got bitten trying to separate the two dogs. The vet’s bill to stitch up Bobby’s wounds came to R5 608.

          On WhatsApp Jaric undertook to cover the vet’s bill “no matter what the cost”, but he has been a bit slow in coming up with the money. At the time of posting this he had only paid R1 000, although the attack took place a month ago.

Isn't that sweet. Another
Glocky look-alike

          Bradley Parsons maintained this was not an isolate incident as Gloky had twice attacked his boxers a couple of years ago. At the time Jaric initially agreed to pay the vet’s bill, but soon recanted. He told Bradley that he got Glocky from a farm where it was being trained for dog fighting and he was rehabilitating it. 

          Bradley believes the law should take its course. Unfortunately there seems to be very little likelihood of that. Apparently the attack was reported to the Police and all they did was to give Jarec a warning. This is in spite of Glocky having bitten various dogs and being credited with having killed several cats and even a porcupine, as the estate adjoins a wetland area where there is a variety of small wild animals.

          After another member of the WhatsApp group complained that he was paying for security when children could not play freely because of a dog, Suzi Schalk retorted: “That’s not the point and FYI children should not be roaming around freely in any estate, definitely not in these times, in my opinion.”

Another Glocky look-alike showing he is not only 
good with kids but with other dogs as well

          She then made out that she was a pit bull expert and that Bobby’s owner Lesley was actually to blame for what happened. “I know pit bulls believe me - they are to be handled carefully,” she maintained. “A stranger bear hugging a strange dog is idiotic. What on earth was this person thinking?”

          If it had actually happened it was not half as idiotic as what Suzi had to say. What did she expect Bobb’s owner to do when her dog was attacked unexpected in the street while she was taking it for a walk. There was nothing at all idiotic about her reaction. Most people would have done exactly the same.

          Lesley feels that Glocky needs to be re-homed far away or put down as it is probably going to continue being a problem on the estate.

          What do the rest of you think?

          Regards,

          Jon, another type of dog, one of the good ones – a Consumer Watchdog and a ‘Keep Housing Estates Safe’ advocate.